Proving Myself

I have always had a hard time with wanting to prove myself to people, but lately I have been reminded by my best friends and parents and by an amazing God that I don't have to prove myself to anyone. That it's okay not to be okay, and that my convictions are mine and some people aren't going to understand- and that's completely fine.
    I've struggled with wanting to prove myself to other people my whole life. Whether if that would be with grades, how I treat people, how people viewed my relationship with a boyfriend, and so much more. The weight of feeling the need to prove myself started to effect my everyday life, and finally I just gave that to God. I gave that to God not because I want to be a better Christian, but because I keep realizing that He is the only one that can satisfy me and give me peace. The fact that I don't need to prove myself to God,because He gives us grace and forgiveness, then why do I need to prove myself to other people?

I don't.

For me, this doesn't mean not taking anybody's advice who has my best interest, but to humble myself before God and truly ask HIM if this is okay and let him lead my life. I truly believe that God puts people in our lives to speak truth to us and that what they're saying is valid, but God's plans will prevail.

Letting go of proving myself will be a struggle the rest of my life because who doesn't want to be the best at something or who doesn't want to make people proud? But at the end of the day, God will be my answer and the one I want to keep being my best for.

"You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and win I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways" (Psalm 139:1-3).